


Stiles and the Not-So-Fake Boyfriend

by CognizantCatastrophe



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Not 3B compatible, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-28
Updated: 2014-05-28
Packaged: 2018-01-26 22:14:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1704467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CognizantCatastrophe/pseuds/CognizantCatastrophe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles does NOT have a boyfriend: of that, the pack, his dad, and the entire community of Beacon Hills are completely convinced. It's just a fact that Stiles is single. Poor Stiles; he's probably lonely. Maybe they can set him up with someone!</p><p>Unless you're Stiles, that is. Seriously. He DOES have a boyfriend. Why won't anyone believe him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stiles and the Not-So-Fake Boyfriend

**Author's Note:**

> Look at what I found on my flash drive!
> 
> Sorry I've been away for so long (dreadful last few months, really). I started writing this ages ago, so it's not 3B compatible. It's also not beta-read.

“Stiles, there you are!”

Stiles looked up on the way to his car to see Danny making his way over with Ethan, followed by a mysterious albeit attractive blonde Stiles had never seen before.

“Hey, guys,” Stiles said, looking at the blonde curiously. “Who’s your friend?”

“This is Jay,” Danny beamed, turning to the blonde. “He’s my new neighbor. The three of us are going to the movies tonight to celebrate the end of high school. We thought we would ask you to go. We could make it a double date!”

Stiles’ eyes widened incredulously. “Danny!”

“What?” Danny asked, looking at him innocently. “Come on, Stiles, it could be fun!”

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Danny, I have someone, you know that.”

This time Ethan was the one to roll his eyes. “You’ve been saying that for the past year and we have yet to see you with anyone. You don’t go on dates. Hell, Danny went through your phone last month.”

“You did what?” Stiles screeched, giving Danny an accusing look.

“Yeah, I went through your contact list,” Danny shrugged. “You didn’t have a single person I didn’t know, Stiles!”

“So what?”

“So,” Ethan growled. “You’re obviously lying. You’re not seeing anyone.”

“I thought you guys were lie detectors. Do I sound like I’m lying to you when I say I’m in a very committed relationship?”

“No,” Ethan frowned. “That obviously means you have somehow managed to learn how to lie to us. We as a pack have come to that conclusion, by the way, so we take everything you say with a grain of salt.”

Stiles gaped. “You have got to be kidding me. You guys are ridiculous.” Stiles turned an apologetic smile at Jay. “Despite what these two idiots are telling you, I really am in a relationship. I’m sure you’re a great guy, but I’m going to have to decline.”

“No problem,” Jay grinned shyly. “You’re really cute, though, so if you change your mind, let me know.”

Stiles blushed as he climbed in his car and made his way home. He grinned when he saw his dad’s cruiser in the driveway. It wasn’t often the Sheriff was home during the day, especially as Stiles was getting home, but it was always a nice surprise.

“Hey, kiddo,” Sheriff John Stilinski said from his place at the kitchen table. “How was your last day of high school?”

“Boring,” Stiles shrugged. “Danny tried setting me up with his new neighbor.”

“Really?” John replied. “That’s funny. Mrs. Jones from across the street came by with her granddaughter earlier looking for you. I think she’s trying to set you up as well.”

“Oh, god,” Stiles groaned. “Why?”

“It’s just because they love you,” John laughed, getting up and ruffling Stiles’ hair. “They’re tired of seeing you alone. I would be too, but I also know I met your mom in college and I know it’s not too late for you.”

Stiles bit his lip. “Dad…”

“Don’t even try it,” the sheriff said, pointing an accusing finger at Stiles. “Everyone has told me your excuse for not dating has been that you supposedly have someone already. Those same sources also tell me they haven’t seen you on a single date. I’m the sheriff, son. I’d know if you were dating.” The sheriff paused, giving Stiles an apprehensive look. “It’s not an online relationship, is it?”

Stiles sighed and shook his head. “I’m not having this conversation. Just get out of my kitchen. I have a pack meeting to cook dinner for.”

“Okay, okay,” John said, holding his hands up in surrender. “Just remember, if it is an online relationship and you someday decide to meet this person, do so in a public place and tell someone where you’re going first. Sometimes these people aren’t who they say they are, and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“Oh my god, just go,” Stiles groaned, shooing his dad out of the kitchen.

Stiles busied himself with the Crockpot as he prepared pulled pork for sandwiches at the pack meeting. Every other Friday was pack night at Derek’s apartment, since it was the only place without suspicious parents. It had taken months of hounding from the pack, along with a considerable amount of complaining from Cora, but the apartment was finally furnished and actually looked homey. Pack nights consisted of dinner, which Stiles usually made, accompanied by what they affectionately called bonding-time. Sometimes this consisted of them sitting around and talking; other times, they played board games. Stiles’ favorite was when they played board games. They had a Monopoly marathon a few months back that literally lasted the entire weekend.

They always ended the night with at least one movie, if they weren’t already in the midst of a movie marathon. This weekend, they were scheduled to watch all the extended editions of _The Lord of the Rings_ movies. Stiles was feeling fairly excited about that.

When he arrived at the apartment with dinner, only the girls were there. Cora, Allison, and Lydia stopped talking the minute he entered and he frowned. “What’s up?” he asked, setting the Crockpot and some bags on the counter in the kitchen.

“You’re not supposed to be here,” Cora states, giving him a curious look.

“I’m not?”

“No, Stiles, you’re not,” Lydia glared. “Leave. Now.”

Stiles felt a little hurt at that. “What, are you guys kicking me out?”

“Yes,” Allison nodded. “We’ll see you later, Stiles, but it’s girl-time right now.”

“Girl time?” He asked, feeling confused. “You’re not kicking me out of the pack?”

Cora snorted at that. “Are you kidding? Stiles, pack is family. You don’t just get kicked out.”

“Then why do I have to leave? Why do I have to miss the meeting?”

Allison suddenly had a look of realization. “Oh, Stiles, no! We agreed at the last meeting to change the date for the next one, remember?” she said. “We decided we’d rather have this weekend to ourselves and we’ll all hang out after graduation instead, so we’re having the pack meeting next weekend.”

Stiles flushed with embarrassment. Now that Allison mentioned it, he did vaguely remember a conversation about moving the meeting, but he was a bit distracted at the time. His embarrassment deepened when he glanced at the food he’d brought. “Okay, I’ll go,” he sighed. “I’ll just leave all this here. I’m sure you guys will get hungry, as will Derek and Peter if they ever show up.”

“We’ll take care of it,” Lydia nodded, shoving him out the door.

Stiles sighed and shoved his hands into his pockets as he made his way down the steps. He pulled his phone out and sent a text, knowing full-well he was now destined to be alone for the night. _“Since I apparently have nothing to do tonight, you want to come over? I think you owe me a make-out session.”_

Stiles grinned when his phone chimed, signaling a received text. _“I’ll be right there.”_

**One Week Later**

“I am so proud of you,” the sheriff grinned as he pulled Stiles in for a hug after the graduation ceremony was over. “Are you still spending the weekend with your friends?”

“If it’s okay with you,” Stiles nodded. “If you’d rather spend it with me, I’ll ditch them.”

“Nah,” John grinned. “Go have fun with your friends. I live with you, kid; it’s not like I won’t be seeing you soon enough.”

"Thanks, Dad."

"No problem, kiddo; have fun," the sheriff said, ruffling Stiles' hair affectionately. "Go out and socialize. Maybe you'll meet someone."

"Dad!"

"Okay, okay," the sheriff laughed. "Just have fun."

“Okay,” Stiles said as his dad climbed into his cruiser. Stiles made his way towards the parking lot, occasionally stopping and exchanging a few words with someone he knew. When he made his way to the jeep, he was surprised to see Cora waiting for him.

“Hey,” she waved. “Can I get a ride with you? Derek is waiting on Isaac.”

“Sure,” he said as they both climbed into the jeep and made their way to the Hale apartment. “We’re just ordering pizza tonight, right?”

“Yeah, Derek already called it in.”

“Good, because I so don’t have time to make anything,” he laughed.

For the most part, the pack night was like most of their pack nights. They ate pizza and everyone talked about the graduation ceremony, as well as their plans for the summer. Stiles and Allison were taking their general education courses at the local community college while they figured out what they wanted to major in. Lydia would be leaving soon for MIT, and Aiden planned on going with her. Danny and Ethan were planning to take a year off school, and Scott was going to work on being certified as Deaton’s assistant. Cora was going to NYU like Laura and Derek, and Isaac was still unsure whether he’d stay with Derek or go with Cora.

It wasn’t until they were half-way through _The Fellowship of the Ring_ that Lydia pinned her gaze on Stiles. “Stiles, I’m setting you up on a blind date.”

“Excuse me?” Stiles gaped as all eyes turned on him. “No, Lydia! You can’t do that.”

Lydia glared. “Stiles, you’re the only one of us who hasn’t been on a date in ages. For crying out loud, you have never dated anyone! We’re officially not in high school anymore, which means it’s time to get your big-boy pants on and play the field. I’m making it my mission to get you laid. You will not be a virgin when you start college if it’s the last thing I do.”

“But I’m taken!” Stiles blushed. His flush deepened when almost everyone gave him a disbelieving look. “Seriously, guys, I have someone!”

“You’re still a virgin,” Ethan said, casually draping his arm around Danny. “We’d smell the difference if you got laid, even if we didn’t know who. You haven’t smelled any different since I met you.”

“I can’t believe I’m discussing this with you guys, but we were waiting until after graduation,” Stiles bit out, glaring at all of them. “We never had an opportunity, so we just decided to wait unless something came up before then, and it never did. Seriously, guys, I’m very happy and in a committed relationship with someone I am very much in love with.”

“Right,” Lydia replied. “We don’t believe you, Stiles.”

“Oh, my god, fine!” Stiles yelled, throwing his hands up. “You want to know who I’m dating?” he said, standing up and glaring at all of them with his hands on his hips. “You really are this determined to meddle in my life that you won’t stop until you get what you want?”

“If you just tell us, we’ll stop,” Allison shrugged. “We’re worried about you, Stiles. We don’t want you to be lonely, and we know you get lonely.”

“Fine,” Stiles snapped, spinning around. He stomped over to the recliner where Derek was currently, miraculously, sleeping. Stiles always wondered how Derek was able to sleep through anything during pack meetings. Stiles figured having the entire pack around was comforting to him. Stiles crawled on top of the man, straddling his hips. He buried one hand in Derek’s hair and leaning forward, pressing his lips to Derek’s.

Despite being woken up, Derek wasted no time in returning the kiss. His lips slid against Stiles’ gently, one hand resting on the back of Stiles’ neck while the other drifted to the small of his back, pulling him closer. Only the need for air finally pulled them apart.

“Hi,” Stiles grinned, brushing his nose against Derek’s.

“Hey,” Derek growled happily, chest rumbling as he pulled Stiles closer and nuzzled his neck.

“Remember a few weeks ago when we talked about how and when we would tell the pack about us?”

“Mmm,” Derek mumbled sleepily. “What about it, babe?”

“They know now.”

Derek’s eyes snapped open as he looked at the pack, all of whom were staring at the pair in complete shock. “Stiles,” Derek growled. “What did you do?”

“They were trying to set me up on a blind date!” Stiles pouted. “They’ve been trying to set me up on different dates lately, and no matter how many times I told them I already had someone, they wouldn’t believe me.”

Derek growled louder at that, glaring at all of them. “No more,” he bit out, pulling Stiles closer possessively. “He doesn’t need your help.”

“Well that’s an understatement,” Lydia chimed. “How long has this been going on?”

“A year,” Stiles replied as he curled against Derek’s chest. “At first we kept it a secret because I wasn’t 18 yet and we didn’t want him to get in trouble, but after my birthday, it was just a habit. We liked the privacy.”

“I guess that explains why there wasn’t anyone in his contacts list we didn’t know,” Danny mumbled.

Stiles grinned and snuggled against Derek. “Now you guys will leave me alone, right?”

The pack nodded, wide-eyed. Derek huffed and rubbed his nose on the patch of skin behind Stiles’ ear. “Good. Anyone who tries to set him up again will have to deal with me.”

“Maybe they’ll listen to you, big guy. They sure don’t listen to me,” Stiles replied.

“We just wanted you to be happy, Mom.”

Stiles’ eyes widened and he stared at Isaac. “What did you call me?”

“It makes sense,” Lydia shrugged. “You feed us, clean up after us, help the others with homework… basically everything a mother would do. You’re the pack mom and Derek is the pack dad.”

“They have a point,” Derek shrugged. “Besides, they definitely act like children.”

“Do not!” Scott pouted.

Stiles frowned and looked at Derek. “I thought we were going to wait until after I was done with college before kids entered the picture.”

“You’ve talked about kids!?” Scott gaped.

Derek raised an eyebrow. “Of course we’ve talked about children. Why wouldn’t I talk about children with my mate?”

“He’s your mate?” Cora gasped.

“Mates are a thing?” Isaac asked.

“Nice, dude,” Ethan nodded.

Stiles shook his head before looking back at Derek. “You’re right. They ARE children.”

“Hey!”


End file.
